100+ Clean Jokes for Adults To Keep Smiles Flowing

Laugh Out Loud Safely

Laughter is the best stress reliever, and clean jokes for adults ensure everyone enjoys humor without crossing any lines. Start your day with some witty laughs and explore clever Christmas jokes for extra festive cheer.

Even beyond holidays, fun jokes keep spirits high. For more playful humor, the submarine jokes puns page offers clever lines that entertain and amuse anytime.

100+ Clean Jokes for Adults

Light Chuckles

  1. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? They make up everything.
  2. What do you call a fish wearing a bowtie? Sofishticated.
  3. Why did the scarecrow win an award? He was outstanding in his field.
  4. I told my computer I needed a break. It said: “No problem, I’ll go to sleep.”
  5. Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They might crack up.
  6. What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.
  7. How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together.
  8. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing.
  9. Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
  10. How does the ocean say hi? It waves.

Clever Giggles

  1. I’m reading a book about anti-gravity — it’s impossible to put down.
  2. What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta.
  3. Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tired.
  4. How do you organize a space party? You planet.
  5. Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because it felt crummy.
  6. How do cows stay up to date? They read the moos-paper.
  7. Why did the math book look sad? It had too many problems.
  8. What did one plate say to the other? Lunch is on me.
  9. Why don’t oysters share their pearls? They’re shellfish.
  10. Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.

Fun & Friendly

  1. What’s brown and sticky? A stick.
  2. How do you catch a squirrel? Climb a tree and act like a nut.
  3. Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged.
  4. I would tell you a construction joke, but I’m still working on it.
  5. Why did the chicken join a band? Because it had the drumsticks.
  6. How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it.
  7. Why did the balloon go near the needle? He wanted to be popped.
  8. Why did the baker go to therapy? He kneaded help.
  9. What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? “Supplies!”
  10. How does a train eat? It goes chew-chew.

Safe Laughs

  1. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? They make up everything.
  2. What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese.
  3. How do you know the ocean is friendly? It waves.
  4. Why did the picture go to jail? Because it was framed.
  5. What did the grape say when it got crushed? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
  6. How do you make holy water? Boil the hell out of it.
  7. What did the big flower say to the little flower? “Hey, bud!”
  8. Why was the math book sad? Too many problems.
  9. Why did the stadium get hot after the game? All the fans left.
  10. Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don’t work out.

Witty Humor

  1. Why did the computer go to the doctor? It caught a virus.
  2. Why did the skeleton not cross the road? He didn’t have the guts.
  3. How does the man in the moon cut his hair? Eclipse it.
  4. What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer.
  5. Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.
  6. What did the stamp say to the envelope? Stick with me and we’ll go places.
  7. How do you fix a broken pizza? With tomato paste.
  8. What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.
  9. Why did the man put his money in the freezer? He wanted cold hard cash.
  10. How do you make a lemon drop? Just let it fall.

Family-Friendly Fun

  1. Why did the egg hide? It was a little chicken.
  2. How do you organize a party in space? You planet.
  3. Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
  4. How does a snowman get around? By riding an “icicle.”
  5. Why did the shoe go to school? To learn its sole lessons.
  6. How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it.
  7. Why was the broom late? It over-swept.
  8. What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.
  9. How do you catch a squirrel? Climb a tree and act like a nut.
  10. What did one plate say to the other? Lunch is on me.

Punny Adults

  1. Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged.
  2. I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
  3. How do cows stay up to date? They read the moos-paper.
  4. What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta.
  5. Why did the math book look sad? Too many problems.
  6. How do you organize a space party? You planet.
  7. Why don’t oysters share their pearls? They’re shellfish.
  8. How do you make holy water? Boil the hell out of it.
  9. What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? “Supplies!”
  10. Why did the baker go to therapy? He kneaded help.

Clean & Clever

  1. Why did the stadium get hot after the game? All the fans left.
  2. Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Some relationships don’t work out.
  3. How does a train eat? It goes chew-chew.
  4. Why did the balloon go near the needle? He wanted to be popped.
  5. Why did the picture go to jail? Because it was framed.
  6. How does the man in the moon cut his hair? Eclipse it.
  7. What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.
  8. Why did the man put his money in the freezer? He wanted cold hard cash.
  9. How do you fix a broken pizza? With tomato paste.
  10. Why did the coffee file a report? It got mugged again.

Giggles Galore

  1. Why did the egg cross the playground? To get to the other slide.
  2. What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese.
  3. Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired.
  4. What’s a skeleton’s favorite instrument? Trom-bone.
  5. How does the ocean say hi? It waves.
  6. Why did the computer go to therapy? It had too many bytes.
  7. How do you make holy water? Boil the hell out of it.
  8. Why did the tomato blush? It saw the salad dressing.
  9. How do you make a lemon drop? Let it fall.
  10. Why did the man put his shoes in the freezer? For cool soles.

Laughs Without Limits

  1. What did the janitor say when he jumped out? “Supplies!”
  2. Why did the chicken join a band? For the drumsticks.
  3. How do cows stay fit? They do moos-cle workouts.
  4. Why did the skeleton go to the party alone? He had no body to go with.
  5. What’s brown and sticky? A stick.
  6. How do you catch a squirrel? Climb a tree and act like a nut.
  7. Why did the balloon go near the needle? He wanted to pop.
  8. Why did the baker knead therapy? He kneaded help.
  9. How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together.
  10. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing.

Keep Laughing Every Day

Clean jokes for adults are perfect for any setting—home, office, or casual gatherings. They bring humor without risk, helping everyone enjoy a light-hearted moment. Sharing a few of these clever jokes can break tension, spark conversation, and make even a dull day more fun.

If you want to explore more themed humor, check out fat jokes for witty, clever, and safe laughter everyone can enjoy.

Beyond that, creative and quirky humor keeps smiles going. The foot jokes page delivers playful, safe jokes that are perfect for sharing with friends, family, or colleagues anytime you want to lighten the mood.

With these clean jokes, laughter becomes effortless, fun, and endlessly shareable, making each day brighter and more enjoyable for all.