100+ Chuck Norris Jokes That Pack Unstoppable Humor

Power Up With Chuck Norris Jokes

Chuck Norris jokes are legendary for a reason—they combine wit, exaggeration, and unstoppable humor into one hilarious package. Starting your day with a few of these jokes can instantly lift your mood and make even the dullest moments more entertaining. Fans of legendary feats and extreme humor will especially enjoy these jokes, which highlight Chuck Norris’ over-the-top persona.

For more fiery fun, explore fire jokes to ignite your laughter. And for a slightly spooky twist, check out vampire puns, which are packed with clever wordplay that will keep you chuckling long after reading.

Get ready to dive into 100+ jokes that show Chuck Norris’ humor at its peak—no one delivers absurd, over-the-top punchlines quite like him.

100+ Chuck Norris Jokes

Legendary Moves

1. Chuck Norris counted to infinity. Twice.
2. When Chuck Norris enters a room, he doesn’t turn the lights on. He turns the dark off.
3. Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
4. The Boogeyman checks under his bed for Chuck Norris.
5. Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
6. Chuck Norris once won a game of Connect Four in three moves.
7. When Chuck Norris does push-ups, he doesn’t push himself up. He pushes the Earth down.
8. Chuck Norris can unscramble an egg.
9. Chuck Norris can hear sign language.
10. Chuck Norris’ tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.

Epic Fights

11. Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are known today as giraffes.
12. Chuck Norris can win a staring contest with the sun.
13. Chuck Norris once knocked out a brick wall just by staring at it.
14. When Chuck Norris does a push-up, the Earth moves.
15. Chuck Norris can speak braille.
16. Chuck Norris can strangle you with a cordless phone.
17. Chuck Norris counted to infinity backwards.
18. Chuck Norris can light a fire by rubbing two ice cubes together.
19. Chuck Norris’ shadow can bench press him.
20. Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door without moving.

Extreme Skills

21. Chuck Norris can drown a fish.
22. Chuck Norris can dribble a bowling ball.
23. Chuck Norris once won a game of rock-paper-scissors using a single finger.
24. Chuck Norris can punch a cyclops between the eye.
25. Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open.
26. Chuck Norris once made a Happy Meal cry.
27. Chuck Norris can hear a silent movie.
28. Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle.
29. Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass at night.
30. Chuck Norris can do a roundhouse kick faster than the speed of light.

Power Moves

31. Chuck Norris can tie his shoes with his feet.
32. Chuck Norris can blow bubbles with beef jerky.
33. Chuck Norris can run around the world so fast, he catches yesterday.
34. Chuck Norris once got bitten by a rattlesnake; after five days of pain, the snake died.
35. Chuck Norris can play the violin with a piano.
36. Chuck Norris can unscramble scrambled eggs.
37. Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door without entering.
38. Chuck Norris can make onions cry.
39. Chuck Norris can speak Morse code fluently.
40. Chuck Norris can sneeze his head off and reattach it without a scratch.

Epic Humor

41. Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
42. Chuck Norris once made a Happy Meal cry.
43. Chuck Norris can punch a cyclops between the eye.
44. Chuck Norris can blow bubbles with beef jerky.
45. Chuck Norris can play chess with a pigeon… and win.
46. Chuck Norris can strangle you with a cordless phone.
47. Chuck Norris once won a game of Connect Four in three moves.
48. Chuck Norris can win a staring contest with the sun.
49. Chuck Norris can hear sign language.
50. Chuck Norris can count to infinity… twice.

Legendary Feats

51. Chuck Norris can kill a vampire by staring at it.
52. Chuck Norris can cut a knife with a slice of butter.
53. Chuck Norris can unscramble the alphabet.
54. Chuck Norris once held a horse accountable.
55. Chuck Norris can sneeze the Internet offline.
56. Chuck Norris can juggle chainsaws blindfolded.
57. Chuck Norris can punch a hurricane in the face.
58. Chuck Norris can hold his breath until the ocean dries up.
59. Chuck Norris can make a slinky stand still.
60. Chuck Norris can ride a unicycle across the Grand Canyon.

Supernatural Power

61. Chuck Norris can see in infrared.
62. Chuck Norris can speak fluent dolphin.
63. Chuck Norris can walk on water… backwards.
64. Chuck Norris can make a volcano erupt just by frowning.
65. Chuck Norris can defeat a mirror in a staring contest.
66. Chuck Norris can bench press a tornado.
67. Chuck Norris can bend steel with a wink.
68. Chuck Norris can fry an egg on his abs.
69. Chuck Norris can sneeze lightning bolts.
70. Chuck Norris can turn coal into diamonds by staring.

Outrageous Feats

71. Chuck Norris can shave a lion with a single whisker.
72. Chuck Norris can whistle underwater.
73. Chuck Norris can tame a shark with his aura.
74. Chuck Norris can outrun a cheetah… on roller skates.
75. Chuck Norris can sneeze in slow motion.
76. Chuck Norris can juggle fire, ice, and lava.
77. Chuck Norris can swallow a sword without blinking.
78. Chuck Norris can wrestle a tornado.
79. Chuck Norris can erase history… with a look.
80. Chuck Norris can break gravity with a kick.

Fun With Chuck

81. Chuck Norris can laugh in sign language.
82. Chuck Norris can turn invisible… while standing still.
83. Chuck Norris can make snow fall in summer.
84. Chuck Norris can play hopscotch across continents.
85. Chuck Norris can surf on a tsunami.
86. Chuck Norris can whistle Beethoven’s 5th symphony.
87. Chuck Norris can bake cookies with lava.
88. Chuck Norris can skateboard on clouds.
89. Chuck Norris can yodel underwater.
90. Chuck Norris can win hide-and-seek with a ghost.

Ultimate Chuck Norris

91. Chuck Norris can bend light around him.
92. Chuck Norris can punch time in the face.
93. Chuck Norris can run faster than sound… backwards.
94. Chuck Norris can teleport… by blinking.
95. Chuck Norris can lift mountains without breaking a sweat.
96. Chuck Norris can erase mistakes by frowning.
97. Chuck Norris can jump over the moon… twice.
98. Chuck Norris can swallow the sun and still smile.
99. Chuck Norris can sneeze out stars.
100. Chuck Norris can make jokes so powerful they rewrite reality.

End With Unstoppable Laughs

Chuck Norris jokes are perfect for fans of outrageous humor and anyone who enjoys extreme exaggeration. These jokes guarantee laughs, lift moods, and provide endless entertainment.

For more seriously funny laughs, explore seriously funny jokes, filled with clever twists and hilarious setups suitable for all audiences.

If you enjoy quirky and spooky humor, bat puns add an extra layer of fun, combining wordplay and absurdity that complements Chuck Norris’ legendary persona. Together, these jokes create a perfect collection to share, enjoy, and keep the laughter going all day.

With these 100+ Chuck Norris jokes, unstoppable humor is guaranteed—ready to entertain fans, friends, and anyone in need of a good laugh.